Friday, August 8, 2008

~~No worrying here~~

Hi all...I am trying to think positive today. Not going to worry about bills or anything that has to do with money. I am waiting on ChaCha to send my confirmation e-mail..Hate waiting, it seems that is all I ever do. The sun is shinning, and not feeling to anxious. I probably will when I go down to my mom's house at 5pm..that's when I see my daughter's daddy. The first thing he will do is open up his bank envelope and show me there is nothing left for me..he always does that on Friday's,.. which hurts my feelings a lot. I don't even have to ask him for money and he does that. Oh well. Here is the thing with me and her daddy. 4 years ago I had him move out of our home because he is an alcoholic. To this day, he still is. He stays at his friends house, in there yard, in his van. He buys a 30 pack every other day. So the reason he usually can't help me out is because he puts all his needs before mine, which is his right since we don't live together. The thing that really pisses me off about the whole thing is, when I asked him to move out 4 years ago, he said he would quit drinking, so he could move back in with us. Well, he didn't quit drinking...and I can't go on with my life because of him. I keep waiting. Waiting on what? Like I said, all i do is wait. I wish that guy who I talked about on one of my writings would just knock on my door and ask me to marry him. Would i say yes? I don't know. It would solve my problem with my daughters daddy. But could i say yes if the guy I really believe is "the one" ...but not going to worry about that today either. Just going to concentrate on getting down to my moms and seeing her daddy, then coming back home and putting my pajama's back on..that is when I am in my safe mode. Well, God bless everyone, and will talk again soon. Have a great weekend
Sincerely, Barbara~

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